By Laura Fredricks for Bridal Guide

Need to ask your parents for money or your 'maids to spring for a pricey frock? Here, "ask expert" Laura Fredricks shows you how to get the answers you want to hear.

In wedding planning, as in life, there are uncomfortable topics you have to cover, so knowing the right way to ask (instead of argue) for things gives you a way to resolve any possible ripples before they become tidal waves. When the asking is out of the way, there's more time for enjoying, celebrating and making memories. Isn't that what your big day is supposed to about? Here, some ideas.

You could start by saying, "We would love to have you help us celebrate and I know this will require extra time and money on your part. Do you think you could make a vacation around the wedding? I'm sure we can work with the hotel to get you extended nights at our wedding rates."

How to ask for someone not to be in your bridal party:

It's no secret that with two sets of families involved, assumptions will be made that might not necessarily mesh with your big-day plans - but what do you do when a friend assumes she'll be part of the bigger festivities? Instead of hoping and praying your friend will understand, get in front of the conversation and say, "I would have loved to have a larger bridal party, but I hope you can support our decision to keep it small - I'm asking that this not jeopardize our friendship." Read how to choose your bridesmaids.

Reinforce how important your friend is to you and ask her to participate in another special wedding activity, emphasizing how much that would mean to you. Not everyone will understand but by asking for their support, you can feel good that you recognized a friend's feelings and want to remain close.

For example: "Mom/Dad, you know we couldn't be happier at this time in our lives. We're going to have the wedding of our dreams, but we're feeling the financial pressure between the caterers, flowers, bridesmaids' dresses and limousines. Would it be possible for you to pay for the rehearsal dinner? We kept the wedding party to our closest friends and family and we can work with the site on the menu so that it won't cost a fortune."

In that case, you may ask, "It is wonderful that you want to invite so many friends to share in our special day but my dream has always been to keep it on the smaller side. I'm so happy we are planning this as a family - can we work together to keep the list a bit shorter? I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings but I would rather have a smaller, more intimate ceremony."

Try saying "I know all this adds up to a lot of money and the last thing I want to do is put my friends and family in financial hardship. We're happy to help with your [select any of the following that fits into your budget] travel expenses, hair and makeup costs for the big day or the cost of your dress."

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